(107) Austin Thomas: Silent Restaurant

Austin wants to open a restaurant where the soundtrack is complete silence. Do people really want to eat while alone with their thoughts? And more importantly, is that cool?

Listen to Austin’s idea from Episode 107 of How Cool Is This? and read a transcript of the full 5 minute podcast episode below:

NICK: Brian, how cool is Austin's idea for silent restaurant?

BRIAN: This is a very cool idea. I don't know how often I would do it, but I would definitely do it at least once.

NICK: At least three to four times a week, I would prefer to have a meal where I ate in complete silence and nobody bothered me. This sounds like a restaurant that was honestly created for me.

BRIAN: What would stop you from eating in silence?

NICK: I mean, that's a fair point. I guess I could go sit at a restaurant where nobody else is being silent but if other people are talking that's going to ruin my desire for silence.

Noise pollution can ruin all sorts of experiences, including the first Wednesday of the month when drinks and appetizers are half off.

BRIAN: It's cool to have a special. If your restaurant is just doing the same thing every day, that doesn't feel like you care about your customers.

NICK: How do you enforce the rules in silent restaurant? If you yourself have to be silent?

BRIAN: It seems like you'd have a bodyguard or some type of doorman or door woman. Or door person who chooses not to identify by a binary gender code, who could just very quietly escort, anybody who talked, out of the room.  

NICK: A silent bouncer.

BRIAN: A silent bouncer who would communicate to everybody without speaking the world.

NICK: I could see that being very intimidating, honestly. If someone just looked at me with, uh, you know, a mean mug, so to say, I think I would shut up. I would follow the rules.

BRIAN: What would you say about sign language? You know, for deaf people, every restaurant is a silent, right?

NICK: I do agree though, that at silent restaurant, you should not be allowed to dine with other people, even if you want to communicate with those people in sign language.

BRIAN: See, that's where my big holdup is, because what if there was a group of 4, 6, 8 that all wanted to go try this out?

NICK: They'd have to sit at separate tables and not talk to each other.

BRIAN: OK, so groups of people can go, but they just can't sit together.

NICK: Right. Well you still have to dine alone, so to speak. I guess you could leave the restaurant afterwards and talk but, that'd be flouting the rules just to go in there with a reservation for eight.

BRIAN: As long as they didn't speak, then I don't see a problem.

NICK: What’s the ideal dish to eat in silence?

BRIAN: It couldn't be soup because that'd be a little too slurpy.

NICK: A little disruptive to other people's silent restaurant experience

BRIAN: I feel like dining used to be the loud social experience that broke up a quiet life, but now life is so loud and everything is accessible. That what breaks it up is silence and solitude and quiet.

NICK: Silent restaurant is a refuge for the modern man.

BRIAN: Or a woman or someone who doesn't conform to the binary.

NICK: The modern bouncer, if you will.

BRIAN: Any bouncer who's worth their shit will work the silent restaurant.

NICK: One of the hardest bouncer gigs.

BRIAN: Although most bouncers don't speak. Any time they walk up to you and you know, it's time to go. And even if you don't, they just kinda help you out, but they don't ever have to say anything. So it shouldn't be too hard to find a qualified bouncer.

NICK: Silence can sometimes speak volumes.

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